Let's say some parents want their daughter to have some fun high school experiences. Because of that they tell their daughter she has to ask someone to the girl's choice preference dance. Let's say that the daughter insists its too late to get into a group and promises she'll ask someone to the next girl's choice dance--Spring Fling.Now let's imagine that Spring Fling ends up being on March 19 and it isn't technically a dance. Instead it's ice skating and let's throw in there that the daughter isn't a proficient ice skater.
Now let's imagine that she's been asked to Prom with a boy that goes to a different school. And maybe that prom is on March 25. She insists she'll have a good school dance experience at prom and should be released from the promise to ask someone to Spring Fling. What if the daughter says she'd prefer to ask someone to Sadie Hawkins in the fall.
Should the parents insist that she go to two major dances two weekends in a row? or should they let her off the hook until next fall?
What would your advice be to these hypothetical people?
Comments
You know, hypothetically speaking, of course. :-)
And, as for your daughter, I'd let her make the choice (especially since her choice is to do something as opposed to nothing). I have a 16 year old boy, and it is hard to let him decide on his own. Eventually, I'll let him have his wings...
my MOST fun dances were with people that i was great friends with and who i KNEW i would have a great time with. the dances where i asked someone that i didn't know very well ended up being lame and awkward.
so, when she HAS someone that she wants to ask, she will have a lot more fun than if she is compelled to ask someone just to fulfill a promise.
just sayin'.
and i am right. just sayin' again.
Coming from someone who never got to go to any dances, I regret not having those experiences, bad or good. Isn't better to have the experience than to miss them because of shyness? While others say to let her off the hook, I say it is more important to keep a promise (hypothetical or not)and have the experience. She will have the experience to look back on and grow from it.
Plus many years down the road she will be able to insist her own daughter go through the same experience because she had too! ;)